All good things must come to an end, but still — this is fuckin’ bullshit! The profound suckiness that marked the closure of Videoport, the beloved and iconic video store in Portland’s Old Port, will be leavened slightly by the fact its farewell party at Bayside Bowl (58 Alder St., Portland) promises to be the bash of the season, complete with music by ex-staffers such as bluesman (and Bollard columnist) Samuel James and Jordan Kratz’s storied punk band Big Meat Hammer, video screenings and tributes galore. It starts at 5 p.m. (line up early, folks) and it’s free and all ages. 791-2695. baysidebowl.com. Embittered cynics may wish to forgo the film era entirely, in which case we suggest you head up to St. Lawrence Arts (76 Congress St., Portland) for King of Crows III: Long Live the King, a showcase of 10-minute plays by locals who’ve competed in the Crowbait Club’s monthly Theater Deathmatches last year. Performances take place Sept. 3 through 5, tonight at 7:30 p.m. Tix: $15 (all ages; not suitable for young ones). 347-7177. stlawrencearts.org.