Covered in Bees
Portland Steel
The Entertainment Experiment
Click to hear: “Tank Vs. Spaceship”
Where were you when you heard Van Halen broke up? (Not the wussy Sammy version; the time Diamond Dave got his ass scissor-kicked out of the band.) I was sitting on a little league baseball bench at Lyndon Field in Fairport, N.Y., feeling like life had just gotten a lot more unfair.
I had the same feeling a month or so ago, standing in the Fun Box Monster Emporium on Congress Street, when Covered in Bees drummer Tristan Gallagher told me the bad news about his band. Lead singer Kevin “Boo” Leavitt was sick of the frustrations associated with the local music scene. He was leaving the hive for good.
Shit. Portland’s best rock band was kaput. And this on the verge of the completion of their new album. The CD release show last month for Portland Steel doubled as the Bees’ farewell performance. Life really is unfair.
So what about this swan song? Like everything the Bees have done, it rocks mercilessly, with a mix of menace and humor the band could’ve patented. “I am the wobbly wheel on your shopping cart,” Boo screams on the opener, “Tank Vs. Spaceship,” a track that ranks among the Bees’ best.
“Rock, Staple, Scissors” is a two-minute tornado in the spirit of songs like “Hi-Fives And Handgrenades,” from their 2005 debut, Portland Death Punk Vol. 1, and “What Happens in Portland, Stays in Portland,” from Vol .2. “Fire in the Basement” mines the shout-along hardcore punk tradition and pulls up pure rock gold.
The Bees had a knack for turning ’80s metal riffs into hilarious songs that made fun of the genre while simultaneously delivering the head-bangin’ goods. Portland Steel has two great examples of this. “Drive This Seven Inch Wooden Steak Through My Portland Heart (a.k.a. The Taco Song)” brings Mötley Crüe to Denny’s, laughs at them, and then kicks their butts in the parking lot. “It’s like a snake eating its own tail / It’s like a whale eating another whale.” The other, “I Got a Rockin’ Disease (And Rockin’s The Cure),” speaks for itself.
Portland Steel is a few tracks shorter than the Bees’ previous releases, and a couple songs previously appeared in demo form on the extended version of 2008’s 24 Hour Album — the brutal “Black Grimace” and the stomping, sludgy “God Damn the Queen.” Seeing as how the entire album’s available as a pay-what-you-want download at coveredinbees.bandcamp.com, there’s no reason to complain.
Of course, rock bands never really break up for good. David Lee and the Van Halen brothers reunited for a tour and are supposedly gonna release a new album, and tour again, next year. Let’s hope the Bees don’t take 20 years to do the same.
— Chris Busby
