A (w)Rench in the works
The last thing U.S. Sen. Susan Collins wants to face in the 2026 Republican primary is a certified Trumpsicle. Such a race would agitate the scuzzy underground of anti-Collins sociopaths with their predictable troglodytic gripes (She’s female! She voted to convict Trump! But mostly, she’s female!) that inhabit the GOP catacombs, avoiding daylight, trans people and vaccines.
Collins has been trying not to antagonize her party’s Cro-Magnon wing while mollifying marginally more rational voters appalled by Trump’s mutant parade of wildly unqualified cabinet nominees. She knows she’ll get an icy reception from the Cro-Mags for voting against Creepo Hegseth for Secretary of Offense and Kash Patel for the Federal Bureau of Retribution, even though she supported most of Trump’s carnival sideshow of freakish nominees.
Nevertheless, she won’t have to worry much about the Republican chud who’s running against her in the primary. Instead, Collins may face an independent general-election challenger spawned by Trump’s computer-goon companion, Elon Musk. But I’ll get to him in a moment.
First, let’s dispose of the only GOP globule to thus far declare for Collins’ seat, Daniel Smeriglio of Frenchville. He announced on X that he’s “making a MAGA primary run from the right” (as if such a challenge could come from any other direction). Smeriglio operates an online radio network called Voice of the People USA Radio and Activist Group filled with Christian nationalism, conspiracy theories, historical revisionism and calls to “prepare for Jesus Christ’s return.” According to his YouTube site, he’s an Army vet, a former cop and the ex-head of the St. John Valley Chamber of Commerce. The Bangor Daily News also lists him as security chief for an Illinois medical marijuana company, which seems unlikely. He told the Sun Journal he’ll “be loud, be blunt and be confrontational, peacefully.”
Smeriglio’s announcement video is a warped gem, featuring blaring music, a semi-coherent rant (Collins “represents the worst of Washington”) in between clips from Godzilla movies (!?). It says quite clearly that this guy can be ignored. Even kooks are unlikely to stake their anti-Collins hysteria on some rando with a radioactive reptile fetish.
There’s also a chance Collins could face Republican state Rep. Laurel Libby of Auburn in the primary, but insiders say Libby is more likely to run for governor. Thanks to being censured by the Legislature for doxxing a trans-girl athlete, Libby has lots of name recognition. She’s also a formidable fundraiser. Collins should be worried that a challenge from her poses a serious threat.
But back to the Muskoid.
Campaign analysis isn’t rocket science — except in this case. Phillip Rench was a senior engineer with Musk’s Space X company. Rench moved to Waterboro a few years ago and established a space observatory on his property. Until recently, he was a board member of the Maine Space Corp., a quasi-governmental entity that encourages rocket launches from Maine (because gravity isn’t quite so strong here?).
Rench, who has no political experience, thinks Collins hasn’t been tough enough in standing up to Trump (and Musk?). His candidate-donation history skews liberal (Kamala Harris, AOC) and he appears to be pro-choice. Does that make him a threat to the senator? Probably not.
Meanwhile, the Democrats need a senatorial candidate. So far, the only serious name being floated is Gov. Janet Mills’. When asked about that, Mills made noises that could indicate she’s either considering it or suffering from acid reflux. There have also been stirrings that 2nd District Congressman Jared Golden might take on Collins, but unlike Mills, who’s term-limited out of the governorship and has nothing to lose by running for the Senate, Golden would be slightly favored to win another term in the House next year (even if former Gov. Paul LePage challenges him), but would be an underdog against Collins.
If neither Mills nor Golden runs, the Dems are screwed. Their only announced candidate is Natasha Alcala of Madawaska, an unsuccessful 2024 legislative hopeful who supports building tiny houses and a universal basic income. Of course, there’s still time for the Dems to dredge up a privileged bonehead (a.k.a. Sara Gideon) or a left-wing ideologue (looking at you, Shenna Bellows) as they have in Collins’ last two elections. The senator cruised against such donkey-party second stringers, but that might not stop the Dems from trying again (Hannah Pingree! State Sen. Cathy Breen!?!).
Of course, Rench and ranked-choice voting complicate the odds-making. He probably won’t draw significantly from either side, but margins in previous races weren’t so large that even 10 percent could swing a general election.
That brings us back to Republican Smeriglio. A Google search turns up an actor by that name who was a contestant on Wheel of Fortune in 1983, a bit player on Chicago Fire in 2012 and on Chicago P.D. in 2014.
Same guy as our Danny?
Probably not, but there are jokes there someplace.
If you find them, e-mail aldiamon@herniahill.net.
Correction: In my March column, I said former gubernatorial candidate Eliot Cutler was busted for child porn by the feds. It was actually state investigators that got him.
